Do you win against yourself?

Updated: May 6, 2020

The joke has always been upon you isn't it?

We may ignore what we think but this gut wrenching painful realization makes us so numb and paralyzed because of the burden of truth it carries, that we forget the amount of self loathing it contains.

How much tears are enough to create an ocean? How much pain is enough to echo back in a strong way? How much is too much? Is there any point of it to end?

It took 20 years to realize that honesty is much more important than being positive . Pretending to be fine, all times when you're dying from inside, is toxic. Feeling something is what we can possibly escape but mind full of contents colliding , is harmful. And not being able to do anything yet making sure nobody notices , you not being okay , is helplessness and not strength.

Glorifying this act of helplessness is what we need to stop , as there are people taking up their life unknowing they were progressing too . This needs to be ceased , living grows gradually , as the truth unfolds . The truth about having the constant battle in your head , between two people who completely hate each other and also themselves. This battle, between two extreme people, one seeking positivity and the other is completely opposite , is an interesting one but the most depressing as well , when the battle is between you VS you.

So, tell me how do you sleep at night when both the person are within you? when do you conclude the battle's end and which one wins ? The one has to win and you start wondering , what about the person , who lost the battle, still have his own existence ? So why did he lose it .Is it because he was pretending to be the one ,who he cant or never will ? But why was he pretending to be what he was not? Some thirsty questions like these , never encounters the oasis . because , sometimes you don't  get the closure you want. If the thirst is gone, there is no respect for water anymore .

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